There’s no way to put it lightly: asking for a divorce from your spouse is an incredibly difficult decision to make. It’s one that requires a great deal of thought, consideration, legal steps, and undoubtedly some emotional turmoil. If your marriage has been going through an extended rough patch and you’re considering separating or filing for divorce, it’s important to take these crucial steps before you make it official.

Know your legal rights. When it comes to divorce, there are inevitably legal considerations and steps to cope with. While your friends and family may be able to provide emotional support and you can find out a certain amount of information online, ultimately you will need to talk to trusted legal experts to find out exactly where you stand when it comes to going through the process of divorce without unnecessary worry or complications. Speak to a family lawyer sydney to make sure you understand what steps you’ll need to take and to get experienced legal representation if you do decide to go ahead with the divorce.

Give counselling a try. This is a major decision and not one to take in a hurry. Before you call it quits, talk to your spouse about the option of marital counselling. Seek out a counsellor who has plenty of experience working with couples experiencing marital difficulties, as well as the necessary qualifications and credentials to be undertaking the task. Even if you’re sure that a divorce is what you want and you’ve already made the decision, a counsellor can still be a useful resource for support and a listening ear as you work through the process of separation on an emotional and practical level.

Prepare your children. If you have children, it’s important for both you and your spouse to sit with them and explain that you have decided to separate permanently. It’s best that they’re aware of what’s going on and feel that their emotions are being considered throughout this time before the legalities begin. Prepare for this talk with your spouse and make sure you’re both able to sit and discuss the matter calmly. Aim to present a peaceful united front so your children retain a sense of stability and calm despite the tough news they’re hearing.

Have a plan in place. You’ll need to make practical decisions about what steps you’ll take once the divorce process begins. Will one of you move out of the house, or will you both seek new homes? Do you have somewhere to stay, or will you need to take time to find a new property? Who will the children stay with, and will there be any difficulty making custody arrangements? Have all of the practicalities arranged in advance so you can limit your stress levels once the time comes to separate.

Discuss future childcare arrangements. When custody arrangements come into play, divorce conflict can have a detrimental affect on the whole family. To make the transition as seamless as possible, you’ll need to sit down together and calmly work out how you will divide your childcare responsibilities. It’s best if both parties can come to an agreement that’s fair, that works with each person’s schedule, and provides as much emotional stability for the children as possible.